Dilemma ~ Itunuoluwa Odetokun

I rang the doorbell for the umpteenth time as I hopped from one foot to the other, I could swear my brother was home, yet there was no response from him. I was ready to bend down and relieve myself, when I suddenly remembered we kept an extra key under the large flower pot by the front door.

I grabbed it, struggled to get it into the key hole and open the door and just like I thought , said brother was sat on the couch, I threw my bags at him as I whizzed by, and I managed to pull my jeans down, just it time before my bladder gave way (such relief 😮‍💨)

I came back to the living room and my brother still hadn’t moved, he had a faraway look on his face, his eyes were fixed on the dark spot on the ceiling that leaked during the rainy season, almost like he was having an absent seizure. He obviously didn’t hear me knock or the bell go off and he didn’t even acknowledge my presence. I was tempted to slap the look from his face but instead , I sat next to him and punched his arm playfully and finally, he looked at me

“Where were you? I asked with a look of concern, I was at the door for almost 10 minutes, knocking and ringing the bell, thankfully I remembered the spare key under the flower pot.

He quietly responded with “sorry sis” and went back to staring.

Are you ok?” I asked, with a frown on my face.

“Sis, do I look alright? Am I normal? what am I doing wrong ?”

what is wrong? you are normal in Jesus name , I quickly responded, there is nothing wrong with you.

He went on ..

“My classmates all drive exotic cars, they wear the latest brands, Dele brought the latest iPhone to school the other day, Kola just got his dad a new car , Tunde was bragging about how he just opened a new store for his mum….. sis we are all in school full time, we are all students!!! But when I ask Kola how he got the money, he just says ‘using the internet’ and nothing more”.

I want to make money too, I want to wear nice things, I don’t want to sit on the bus in the heat, squeezed between passengers, I want to help mumsi , spoil you , I want to make money like the boys. He was close to tears, and I could hear the frustration in his voice.

I turned to face him, I held his hands in mine, applying slight pressure until his eyes rose to meet mine and I chose my next words carefully

This world may not always make sense to us and that is because we are not of this world. These hands, your hands, that I hold in mine are blessed. You’re a gifted software engineer in training and like a seed planted on fertile soil, we must trust in God to bring about the right time for your fruit to blossom.

Sis, forget all this story , he said and I know all that but why haven’t I made any money , are we not all gifted engineers in the making, why is my own different?

I swear I will find a way , I swear it will not always be like this, I swear ….

I cut him off quickly, “shut up“!!! what way do you what to find? Why don’t you give yourself time , do you think I couldn’t find ways to make money too but here I am , I trusted the process, I finished school, I worked hard and now I am here with a job, making small money

Sis your job doesn’t even pay you enough , we can’t fix the roof because money , you still have to travel all the way to the island to get to work and you say trust the process, what process exactly, he asked?

I couldn’t even blame him, money is tight, it is a constant struggle between pay checks “

But I quickly responded with the word, diligence alone and not money brings you before nobility. When you look to the sides during a race, you will not only lose focus but likely the race entirely. You are too specially and wonderfully made to settle for being a knockoff version of another person”.

He stood up!!! I could tell he was not listening to my preaching anymore

Sis I will find away, he says and I am going to learn how to make money on the internet, it doesn’t matter what it costs and he walked out and left me there…

How do I tell him ill gotten wealth brings no peace, how can I tell him that awoof go one day run belle, how do I tell my innocent brother that, internet work , is literally stealing in broad day light???

Tell me people, how do we educate these young minds, how do we help them focus on the right things , how do we teach them to work hard, and I don’t even blame him, because I am not there yet but I know and trust my God..

but how do we help the younger ones , how do we teach them , reach them and influence them???

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This is such a hard one and there are sometimes that I ask myself too, how I can make quick money ? but thank God for the God in me.

So guys , let’s talk about this in the comments, Mums what do you tell your kids ? what do you tell your siblings and I know the word works but what are the practical ways we can teach our young ones and not just the boys but the girls too , how do we positively influence the younger peeps because the things I see on the internet these days and stories I hear are alarming.

21 thoughts on “Dilemma ~ Itunuoluwa Odetokun

  1. Your brother can actually make money from the internet legitimately. There are loads of skills he can add to his engineering UXI Design/digital marketing. But for the urgency, I’ve been where he is and what I did was find a skull that can fetch me money any day any time no matter my location. Tell him to read about forex trading and find someone or a school that can teach him. In 1-3 months he should be able to start earning cool cash trading currency pairs or crypto.

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  2. This is a very big issue. This get rich quick syndrome. The pressure on our younger brothers, or kids is so great. I tried discussing case studies of those who tried and failed with my brother, and telling him that there is a way that seems right to a man, but the path leads to destruction, but he no wan take ear hear bible things at all. Am truly worried about him.

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    1. Awww !!! It really can be hard. And to be honest we want to make money. No one wants to suffer but we need to do it right

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    2. Sis no one wants to be poor, money is good 😉

      I really hope you find one of the advices here for your brother to use and I pray he sees things clearer and better 😊

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  3. It’s indeed a dilemma, especially as well-meaning, honest advice can be seen as mere pep talk. We certainly can’t stop talking and praying that God should open their eyes but one of the things that might work is to point out the end of some persons that haven’t trusted the process.
    I shed buckets of tears on Sunday when momsy called to tell me that a teenage girl I knew died on Friday. Abortion complications. She was barely 16😭😥😥 Started following boys so early all because of the same ‘I need money and I need it now’ syndrome. I took her to youth groups I belonged to, took her to my homecell, talked and it came to this….
    There are so many examples of people that has met their Waterloo in their unholy passion to make up by all means.
    If the love of God and faith in God does not compel him, maybe fear will😵

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    1. Oops so sorry to read about this young lady, and you are so right in honest advices been seen as pep talks these days.

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  4. Nobody wants to suffer… But then, he should just keep taking one step at a time. And trust God for a successful journey.

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  5. Hmm this issue
    We’ve all faced it one time or the other
    The same my friends are all doing this people my age are doing that and then there’s just me sitting here doing nothing.
    Sometimes the pressure is not even from those around you
    It’s from people you see living their life on social media who are also your age
    And then the pressure starts
    What I used to get through mine was GODs time is the best and I also found sth I’m good at and started doing it more often even if it wasn’t paying just to make sure that I was feeling productive enough
    The thirst for money is high and deadly these days. If you don’t learn to control it now there is no way you would be able to control it even when you’ve got more money.
    I believe we should also seek to serve and do more things for others and for GOD even if it won’t bring us direct and instant money for it is the good and faithful servant that is rewarded.
    Prayer! Prayer! Prayer! If talking is not getting to them get on your knees and pray for them. GOD will work things out by Himself
    Shalom❤️

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    1. Find something you are good at and keep at it even if it does not bring money instantly. Thanks for this tip

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  6. Grace is the first then Smart and hardwork. Getting our hands dirty in the mud to plant, wait for the harvest and fill our barn is hard for younger people today.

    We can pray, speak to them and still fix them in jobs they are qualified to do once the opportunity comes.

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  7. Great story, my tribe sister! A dilemma, indeed. This is the plight of the younger generation and, sad to say, some in the older generations as well. Advice based on the Bible seems too slow for them, while those who seem to be a part of the “get rich quick clan” are flaunting their success. We’ve got to tell these young people that not everything that glitters is gold. And even if it’s gold, is it worth risking everything for? Let’s return to reading Proverbs and listening to PM’s “Bible Before Breakfast” daily. Lots of timely wisdom to gain!

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  8. Beautifully written. This story is all too relatable. The pressure on young men especially is drowning them in sorrow and driving them to ungodly activities just to make money. For a software engineering student, he is learning skills that are in high demand all over the world, so patience is definitely one of the things he needs. An in-demand job opportunity will come if he does his due diligence and depends on God.

    While that doesn’t address the root issue (comparison), praying for your brother and helping him see other non-monetary ways he contributes to the family’s well-being can help. One of the things I always keep in mind when it comes to comparison is a sermon from Pastor Robert Madu which says, “Comparison will always cloud the clarity of God’s call on your life.”

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