Christmas is in the air and people are shopping for presents. People are planning family portraits to use as Christmas cards or excited about going home for Christmas.
Interestingly not everyone is excited about Christmas. Nope I don’t mean non-Christians or the unchurched. They don’t mind actually in fact any holiday that gets you a few days off work or school is welcome and very much appreciated.
Today’s post is for those who Christmas only reminds of the pain in their lives. The women dealing with infertility
I’m writing to my Hannah’s heart mums – the woman trusting God for the very same miracle of Christmas; the birth of a child.
For some reason it feels like the season just triggers feelings of sadness associated with infertility.
I don’t know whether its because Christmas signals the end of another year or the fact that you will find the cutest baby Jesus pictures.
After all it is him we are celebrating so baby pictures galore right?
So why don’t you have one of these blessings right now right?
I know exactly how you feel especially because it seems everyone is making cute family pictures they are sending out as Christmas cards or putting up on social media. So no matter what present you get this year I know the only thing you want is a positive pregnancy test result.
And it will come. How do I know? Because God has promised
And the great thing about God is that He keeps His word. He can be trusted
I know this is a very hard time so here are a few tips to survive the holidays
Advance Forgiveness –
Many times during the holidays, expect to be a little hurt either by some insensitive relative or uninformed stranger. You may hear comments that make you want to punch someone.
Don’t do it darling. Do Not let satan win. Just take a deep breath. Pray in tongues under your breath. Smile sweetly and walk away. Plan to forgive even before you are offended.
If you don’t feel up to attending all events or you just feel like staying indoors with hubby and cuddling in front of the tv with a tub of ice cream or smoothies (healthy ladies, let’s stay healthy 🙈) then by all means do that. It’s okay to say NO! And don’t apologize if you don’t feel like being scrutinized or being the subject of prayer points at gatherings.
My darling, it’s really okay. Say No! Politely and stay home and rest. Don’t worry, next year you will feel better and you can spend Christmas being your fabulous self once again around family. Give yourself permission to take a break especially if you’ve had a long year trying different medical procedures and you aren’t looking or feeling your best with all the hormones that have been pumped into you. I guarantee one more “you are so fat or are we finally expecting?” Will have you ready to go off on someone.
Before you do make sure you have someone who understands what you are going through close by who has your back
Don’t worry, all of this will soon be be over. It’s only a matter of time but till then give yourself permission to be and feel. And like I said for your sanity’s sake it’s okay to say “No” sometimes.
I know you may feel a bit inadequate especially if you are the only one in the family who is yet to give them a grandchild and the temptation to overcompensate May just be there. Well, don’t!
Don’t feel the need to become a door mat. Don’t feel like they are doing you a favor by having you around. If you are legally married then you have as much right as anyone to be at the table – or in this case a part of the family. So don’t let anyone manipulate you with “Ah! Sis we want to go out. Could you babysit. I think you should start practicing o!”
Especially if you know that they are not saying it because they are in faith for you but just as a tool to use you then say a big No! However if you love being an aunty like I do then by all means tell them you will watch the kids because you love them not because you need practice after all how much practice did they need before God blessed them with kids.
Anyway moving on…
This would also be a great time to actually enjoy being an aunty and have the nieces and nephews over for the holidays if you feel up to it. If you don’t that’s still fine just find something that you will enjoy that will keep your mind off all the medical tests and doctors’ appointments and pregnancy test disappointments. I would binge on Christmas movies and lots of pastries 🙈
I’m only human besides PCOS already gave me weight issues and that’s none of my fault. Can I at least enjoy the process of adding weight?! 😁
Ok ladies I hope this helps even if it’s just a teeny weeny bit. Bottom line enjoy the holidays no matter what.
If you are trusting God for a baby then join our Christian support group on @hannahsheartnaija On Instagram or on Telegram by clicking HERE
We’d love to be a part of your journey.