Welcome to day 4 💃🏻💃🏻💃🏻💃🏻💃🏻
Today I was just thinking back to a couple of things that have happened over the years and this came up. You know how I love to share promises with you? Well, it’s partly because My life has been guided largely by promises from God’s word. He’s always given me a word in different seasons and times in my life that have either gotten me through a situation or opened my eyes to something or just given Me assurance that he’s in charge.
I’m not necessarily sharing a promise I picked at any of our JUGN meetings. No Let me share a life promise with you. Something happened the year I got married and ordained. I noticed a cycle or should I say a pattern that’s been repeating itself over the years.
Let’s start with this :
So the first time I got this scripture it was really weird I didn’t fully understand it but it was a new season for me just going into ministry and I needed to know those whom God would be sending to help me. You need to understand that I was in a new place and I didn’t really know or have anyone I could trust. Yes a lot of people looked “good” but I didn’t know them enough to bring into my circle.
So I remember there was a whole lot of drama and with drama always comes gossip. Every one had their opinion of me and what I was about. Who I was and how I had pulled a wool over their pastor’s eyes and deceived him into marrying Me. I heard I was snobbish, arrogant, full of myself and very unfriendly and I was just there because I felt I was better than everyone else. Interestingly, it spread like wild fire and I was hearing things about myself that left even I shocked.
It’s so funny because the people who take the lead on gossiping about you usually have no idea what they are talking about.
By this time there were different factions in church and it was getting a bit too much and I knew where the gossip was generating from. My first reaction was to simply confront them and put everyone in their place and move on. No time for drama.
But God said something to me that got my attention
What?! Why? Let’s just remove it now but He said to me it’s only when you give it time that you can genuinely see what’s wheat and what’s Tare. Before the harvest, it will be easy to mix them up because they look very much alike
It would be so easy to mistakenly pull out the wheat while trying to get to the weeds. So it’s safer to wait. And as always God showed his faithfulness.
The tares were piled together and bundled out. They all drained out of church and I had Peace.
Now this has happened one too many times but I think it’s harder because every time you try to make your circle smaller or put those you think understand it, Once a new season comes some people still fall off
So once you change seasons or you grow into bigger things you may lose some people in your life that used to be crucial to you.
It’s all a part of the weeding process. You outgrow people, they outgrow you no harm done.
However I’m concerned about the people who find themselves on the wrong end of the sickle: the Tares. Usually they are people who you trust who allow envy, gossip, jealousy or malice to get to them and they end up destroying an ordinarily great relationship. You may need to check your heart
Jealousy or envy is the number one cause of this. Jealousy will make you a Tare faster than you can say weed. Sadly it has nothing to do with the person you are jealous of. It’s all on you.
People usually need no help to hate you 😂😂😂 they can do that all by themselves. It’s just a little lie that satan drops in their hearts and keeps enlarging it through gossips
I’m usually careful of people who always have a story about everyone. They always know the gist. They always have something “dirty” on everyone
Yes it’s a proven principle
I’m also skeptical of those people who claim they are “my people” but are always in the midst of people who gossip about me. I remember confronting “a friend” who kept coming up in every funny gist about me. Her defense was people always just come to tell her things about me and she was planning to tell me in due season.
Needless to say she was packed into the Tare pack far away from the wheat. I don’t care what you say even after you’ve forgiven them things never really remain the same. You’ll keep looking over your shoulder, wondering if you can really trust them.
Most relationships never survive betrayal. It’s always very hard to put the pieces back together. Very.
Before ministry I didn’t come too close to betrayal or maybe I should say I never noticed but at some point ministry kind of escalated everything. People I always saw as friends were acting up and I didn’t understand it. They were doing and saying things that made me wonder if they were ever my friends to start with. It was shocking because I was raised to celebrate the victories of others
However it taught me a few things
1. Pay attention to the people on your circle
To be sure we are on the same side and our goal is the same.
2. It also taught me that if people are saying untrue things about me it also means people are saying untrue things about others to me so I have to be careful what I believe
3. I also learnt to check my motives and my heart towards people. Not to use people or manipulate them even unconsciously. God knows I never want to end up a weed in anybody’s life.
Besides if you are insincere it’s bound to show sooner than later. I know I can sniff it a mile away. That’s MY gift. Say what you want I see your heart.
Enjoy your own life. Be a better person. See the beauty in your life. I think that envy comes when your own life is empty. You don’t see the good in your own life.
It then begins to manifest itself in gossip. You feel the need to say things about other people and of course to make it juicier you exaggerate and end up lying.
It’s also scary how people are quick to believe the lies. Usually there’s an easier way to get information other than gossip
I know it never really occurs to gossips because most times the intent of gossip is malice not necessarily to verify information. I find that the worst gossips are the self-righteous prayer warriors. They never think they are gossiping simply passing around prayer points. This is hilarious 😆 😆😆
My question is this….
Sadly most people don’t plan to become tares. At least I choose to believe that. I think that like Judas, Satan enters them and they don’t respond like Jesus with a very loud “Get behind me Satan!” No! They usually go along with a suggestion, a question, a rumor. They listen to the wrong people or things and Satan fans the flame.
One of the biggest lessons I hope you walk away from this with is this:
“YOU HAVE A CHOICE!”
You always do. You can choose to be wheat or Tare in a persons life.
How? By guarding your gates especially the gates that lead to your heart. What you hear and what you see affect you.
Don’t be found in their midst. You cannot handle it. If people find it easy to gossip with you about someone that should trust you. Check your heart.
If you find yourself questioning someone’s actions ask them not someone else that’s gossip.
If you find yourself among people trying to get information from you that can hurt someone who trusts you. Walk away you have a choice. Don’t give fodder for ammunition.
Do you know the biggest difference between wheat and Tare? Even though they look the same at the beginning? When it’s time for harvest the Wheat is left standing straight while the Tare bends wherever the wind blows it.
Now that’s a whole different sermon I preached a while back but today my focus is this: the wheat stands tall because it has substance so it’s not blown around by any wind of gossip or doctrine. The Tare on the other hand bends because it’s seed is empty and hollow.
Are you hollow? Empty inside? No depth? You look good but it’s all eye service? That makes you…. need I say it? Yep! You guessed
Please CHECK YOUR SELF as they say BEFORE YOU WRECK YOURSELF.
On the other hand if you think you are surrounded by tares. Don’t try to remove them manually. Do it in the place of prayer so you don’t mistakenly take out wheat because it hasn’t yet produced a harvest.
Trust God to do it. He ALWAYS does it for me.
Lastly this is a guiding principle
Yes! It always goes back to the heart.
Okay ladies gotta run. I feel a give-away coming up soon….
hmmm… what could it be?
Come back tomorrow maybe I’ll tell you then.