I got this after Christmas last year even though it had been sent earlier. Somehow I missed it. Cos I got it January this year. Anyhow I really liked it and decided to use it this year instead.
Thank you my dear troublesome Disemi.
Enjoy people. I’m sure she’s writing in the behalf of so many of us.
I have never written to you before but I thought I would give it a try, seeing as santa never replies my mails or grants my wishes.
so after years of talking to you , this year I decided to write You instead.
I have been writing to santa for twenty something odd years and I never got a reply or sadly any granted wish. At first I thought he didn’t get my letters and maybe the mail man didn’t post them on time, so I sent them earlier in october so they could get to him but still nothing, but I kept at it out of habit I guess and well silence is all I ever got.
I first heard about santa in 1994, not from mummy though she didnt have all that time to talk about him and neither did daddy or my big sisters, maybe because they were all much older and didnt need him but no one talked about santa until I saw the movie “The santa clause” by Tim Allen and I just fell in love with santa and the whole idea.
I knew it was a movie but I also thought he was well portrayed. so after bugging my father, he finally told me about the north pole and said Nigerians called him father Christmas .
Christmas at mine isn’t the usual at all, we never put up a tree, decorate the house or exchange gifts. we didnt leave milk or cookies out for santa and we definitely didn’t have chimneys that he could come down through and no we didn’t play pretend either, but I liked the idea of being nice, making a wish and seeing that wish wrapped up on christmas morning.
so I wrote to santa, asked for a bike and well skipped the part when I pretended to be sick so I could skip school, I also didn’t tell him I was rude to my sisters, I didn’t think he would notice or mind, but christmas came and went and when I told my dad, he said maybe santa didn’t think I was nice enough. I don’t think I ever owned a bike after that and many years later I still can’t ride a bike and yes I blame him.
I tried harder the following year to be nice, I didn’t want mummy and daddy arguing anymore, they would avoid each other and eat in seperate plates for days and I didn’t like it. but I guess you were to busy because you missed that wish too.
Mummy travelled a few years after and for a long while all I wanted to do was go see her, visit her and probably stay there too but she was gone for ten long years and that never happened. I also didn’t get into senior secondary school after primary 5 or pass JAMB on my first try or graduate when my friends did, I was too busy looking for missing results and I guess I can blame him for all that too.
So year after year, I would write a letter, make a wish and as usual I got nothing but I didn’t give up. finally I met a group of ladies who became friends and one day we all decided to play santa. we would write names on little peices of papers, pick a name, try to figure out what that person wanted and we would surprise them with beautiful things. we called it secret santa
and santa had to remain anonymous until christmas day when we all received our gifts and it felt good. It felt good to unwrap a gift picked with love, it felt good to be thought about in that way, it felt good to give and to see your santees face when they talked about their gift, it felt good to play santa and to put a smile on someone else’s face for a change.
I had hoped it would be a tradition we would continue, it was different , it was nothing like what I was used to and it made christmas much more special.
For a long time I have wanted a real christmas, decorations, a huge tree, ornaments made with care, dinner with my own family and good friends, gifts beneath my tree and hang socks by the fire place with everyone’s name on it, a snowy cold christmas, hot chocolate and movies, a holiday far away with someone I love, time off work, I want to make my own memories, I want my kids to enjoy the myth, I want my own traditions.
So here I am in bed, Its almost 2am and its Your birthday and its the usual no one has remembered to wish me a merry Christmas, even if I have sent out a thousand messages kind of day, there are no fireworks around here because the old folks are asleep and once again I catch myself asking why this year didn’t go as planned, why I didnt have a white and cold holiday like wanted.
I am wondering why I am all alone on the holidays and or why I got to celebrate with a lot of people this year as they unwrapped their many miracles but I had to tough it out, put on a brave face, smile and say constantly that all is well. I am still wondering when I would walk into my home and stare at my tree with gifts wrapped with love
beneath it with my name written on it. I am here wishing that 2017 was less bumpy and that half of my dreams had become flesh.
I know now that santa is nothing but a beautiful myth and christmas isn’t about me or the food, fireworks, gifts beneath the tree but your birth,
I know its a season of giving, loving, sharing and I know that this season is nothing but a beautiful miracle, when God sent you to be born to save a people that didn’t know needed saving,
to become man so you could be bruised, beaten, chastised and ultimately killed
and this miracle never gets old
and I am in awe of you. So today I am asking for a gift of my own, gifts that I can unwrap on chrismas morning but more than that, that I can fully grasp the meaning of the word miracles, not by sharing someone else’s or believing in them or reading about them but that I will come to know miracles and I will have you to thank for each and everyone of them.
I am thankful for this day as always and all that your birth does signify and I am glad we get to relive this miracle each year and that it never gets old.
So here is wishing you a happy birthday Jesus, you know the true meaning of forever young.
Don’t you just love her? Can you believe that after one year still feels like she wrote it today. Please help me tell her to keep writing. She’s amazing. And oh! She sends the best emails. I laugh, cry …… Disemi is such a gift and I hope she knows it.