Hello ladies …valiant queens !
I’m so excited about this new move of God. Something spectacular happened to me this week but I guess I will share some other time but it was a confirmation of Wednesdays is for Wives. Nothing as beautiful as knowing God is holding your hand and that He’s helping you
So Like I said last week one of the biggest things I wished I had as a new bride was mentoring. Yes there were a lot of messages on what to do as a single to make sure you married right and that is so important because as I always say the biggest gift you can give yourself is to marry well.
I always knew one day that I would make that decision. I knew that I would find the kind of man that Thought I was perfect for him and he would be (at least in my eyes) the best thing that ever happened to me but my fear was would we stay that way always? Would we be happy together forever?
Because there was so much instruction for the single girl and just a few materials I could find telling me how to be a wife or in my case a minister’s wife, I didn’t have the strength to keep making mistakes and learning from them.
So I asked God for the one thing I had to know and put in place to guarantee me a happy home. What we both had to do though but I wanted to focus on my own assignment and He told me hebrews 5:33 clearly
So I started searching and trying to find ways to obey this “simple” instruction. I searched different versions of the Bible highlighted, meditated, wrote it out, copied it again till I could come up with practical ways to do this one thing that I felt God was asking me to do. I learnt to do it in creative ways
And I’ve had a really good marriage. A very happy, interesting and exciting one. I’ve grown in ways I could never imagine. My husband is gentle yet firm. Pampers me more than he spoils me though but he’s totally amazing and I would NEVER NEVER EVER trade him for another.
However if I say that submission is my absolute one thing then I would be lying to you. This secret of submission that God gave me was a result of the one thing that I did and that is my absolute most important one thing.
I learnt it from David. He had a habit that changed his life and made him victorious. And if we are going to be virtuous, valiant and victorious wives then we must learn the secrets of victorious people. David had one major secret. He had his one thing that made sure he never missed.
Listen to me no one is married to your husband but you. I would like to say all men are the same but it’s not true.
I learnt this one very early in marriage.
I heard people say if you want something from your husband then cook him his favorite meal. My sister, my husband will eat it, lick the plate, “clean mouth” like they say in Nigeria and still tell you a big fat No!!!
Some say buy sexy lingerie and fulfill all his sexual fantasies then there’s no way he’s giving you a No!!! My sister the No!!! That my husband will tell me is doing press ups.
Treat him nice. Call him sir. Do whatever he says … my sisters I do that anyway so whenever I overdo it he becomes suspicious and wary of me
However, if I simply inquire
- If it is something that I should desire?
- If it is good for me? Is it good for me NOW?
- If it will have a good outcome?
- If I should even bring it up with my husband?
- If my husband should be the channel I get it through? Or believe for it some other way?
- How and when should I ask him if he is the channel?
Usually God gives me full download but if he doesn’t I learn to trust the process and if my husband says No and it hurts I simply use it to build my character by learning to love even when I don’t have my way.
Martha must have tried to do so much. Just like you she must have Tried to be perfect wife, perfect mother, boss at work, godmother, daughter to parents, worker in church just name it…but Jesus said only one thing really matters.
Trust me at the end of the day that’s the biggest edge in marriage that you have -God in your marriage.
You cannot and I repeat CANNOT be a successful wife, mother, career or business woman and not lose yourself without God’s help. Without losing your mind or one suffering for the other. Do yourself a favour
You need God. You need the Holy Spirit to help you. You need to be able to inquire from him constantly. Some times, you will know what to do but at other times you will literally be frustrated. And at those times it’s in inquiring…in sitting at his feet… that’s what gets you through it.
You need alone with God time. If you hope to find some kind of balance then you need to place everything on The Solid Rock.
If no one tells you this we are doing you an absolute injustice. You cannot do this effectively without having your very own “me time” with Jesus. Oh! No you can’t.
Once you get that right, spending time in his presence, asking questions, learning from him, every other thing starts to fall in place. Once your heart is in the right place your actions will follow. You will just know what to do, how to live, how to be a better wife and mother. You will draw strength to be all you need to be. You will operate from a place of peace. A place of SHALOM where nothing is missing and nothing is broken.
Bottom line ladies YOU CANNOT DO THIS WITHOUT GOD!!!
This is your picture in a few short months.
Love you 😘