#USseries 12: WHEN ONLY THE SCAR REMAINS…

September is always a good month for us. For my pk and I. It’s always been a month that births many good things for us.
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It’s the month of our ministry anniversary. Speaking of which it’s been 19 glorious years. Never a better last year at DCC.

It’s also the month of our wedding anniversary and we hit the big 10 this year.
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Then it’s the month of my birth.
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However, I’ve never been big on Birthdays. Okay so maybe that’s not exactly true. I looooooooove to fuss over people on their birthdays. I love planning surprise parties and the whole works but personally,Β  I’m not really a birthday celebrating somebody on my own birthday especially now when people don’t really give you gifts anymore. They think putting you in their dps is enough πŸ˜€ all this social media celebrations and virtual cakes don’t work abeg. Sometimes I want real presents, funny cards and real cake #justsaying.

So, back to what I was saying, yes…birthdays. I’m not big on Birthdays but my mum on the other hand is a birthday person. She believes every year you should celebrate birthdays so she always makes such a fuss.

I remember September 26th 1997. I woke up thinking thank God today will be quiet but of course my mum was having none of that and before I knew it the whole house was filled with the aroma of different kinds of rice and chicken sauces. I was just about to escape when I was hijacked and sent to buy fresh lettuce from my mum’s hausa supplier.

To make the journey less stressful, I stopped by to pick a friend on the way. At least gisting with someone along the way would make the distance seem shorter. As we were walking, I noticed a guy in a trench coat walking towards us. I turned to my friend for a minute to say, “which kind of trench coat is this in Nigeria heat” only to see her running.

Confused I turned back to see why she was running. Lo and behold! The guy was a flasher.
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He was stark naked under his jacket and my friend had seen him before I did and had taken off. Without warning

Since he was only interested in flashing he did and laughing, took off. It was at that moment that I noticed a nail had entered my foot. Call it shock or adrenaline, I simply reached down and pulled out the nail, managed to limp to and fro with lettuce in hand. Once I got home, I was rushed off to the Hospital.

The nurse who attended to me cleaned the wound with methylated spirit and gave me a tetanus shot. I was asked to come daily to dress the wound. Everytime I went they would simply clean the top of the wound and change the dressing. The wound still hurt even after a week but it had formed a scab on top so the nurse said it was healing nicely but it still hurt and it looked a bit swollen at least to me.

On the day of my final appointment my mum asked my cousin and I to drop by at an uncles place on our way to the hospital to get something for her. So we stopped by…

My uncle is a lawyer and can be very persuasive. He started with “sit down, where are you rushing to? Do I see you always?”
So we sat.
“Won’t you eat?”
“Uncle we are in a hurry?”
“Hurry? Who visits family in a hurry? Sit down and eat. Oya isioma go and help your aunty in the kitchen so you can eat quickly”

Knowing better than to argue with an experienced lawyer. I threw my cousin a helpless look and hobbled away. As I was limping to the kitchen he stopped me…
“Wait! What’s wrong with your leg? ”
“That’s what we’ve been trying to tell you. A nail entered it and we’ve been going to the hospital to dress it. We are on our way there now ”
“A nail? Come let me see”
“Uncle, it’s fine. It’s the last day of dressing.”
“Sit!”
So i sat quietly. He raised the foot and pressed it. I screamed. He looked worried. “If this wound is gone it shouldn’t still be hurting you”. He pressed again much harder this time and what looked like pus began to seep through one corner of the scab.
“This is the problem i have with all these incompetent hospitals. We should start suing them in this country.” he called out for my aunty to bring hot water and a small towel.
“Hot water for what?!” I asked already panicking. He smiled and explained how we needed to put heat on it so the scab would fall off so we could expose the wound and clean it out.

That theory made even less sense when I saw the steam rising from the water. All I could hear from the signals my brain was sending was “pain, run, pain, run, pain, pain, pain!”

anyway long story short two hefty men pinned me down and applied my uncle the lawyer (not doctor’s) theory. My uncleΒ  removed d scab and we discovered d wound wasn’t actually healing but rotting.

So all the while the nurse had been cleaning with methylated spirit she assumed because it looked like it was healing on the outside that it was fine on the inside as well.

Aren’t we often like that? Just because someone looks good and put together don’t we assume they are just fine. They can’t possibly be hurting. They can’t possibly have issues. They can’t possibly need Jesus.

We hide things so well. Behind the designer clothes, the spotless makeup, killer stilettos, we often hide our pain and we hide it so well. Everything looks fine on the outside but if people were to get a glimpse of what was really going on inside….

A while ago I had an encounter that totally broke me. You see, I’ve never been able to make friends easily but when I do, I like to keep them for life. I’m very big on loyalty so I consider my friends family and I totally let them in. I had a group of people I considered blood. Anyway long story short I kinda had a judas experience with them. I felt really betrayed and hurt. I said a few prayers, confessed a few scriptures and concluded I was fine after all spiritual tetanus shot given, band-aid in place I moved on. It still hurt but I had developed a nice healthy spiritualΒ  scab in place.

Smiled when I saw them, gritted my teeth through side hugs and dutifully said my “bless yous” (I was after all their pastor too). But somewhere deep inside it still hurt. Everyone thought I healed so quickly, that I managed it all so well but all they needed to do was push a little and some pus was bound to ooze out from one corner somewhere.

Preparing for When Women Worship 2013 IMELA, I had some major heat put on the wound and I was finally able to let a Lot go (pun intended). I mean I kept asking how did Abraham cope with Lot’s betrayal of leaving him. Jesus is God so forgiving Judas was a breeze but Abraham, well let’s just say papa Abraham is as human as they come. Lol!

I poured out my heart, emptied it of pain, unforgiveness, malice (yes, malice. Greeting from the lips not the heart is malice. Speaking to someone and not connecting with them from the heart is malice) and I let him in all the pain filled places.

It didn’t happen overnight, but I gradually genuinely started healing. Today, half hugs have turned to full hugs, smiles actually filter into my eyes, and when I say bless you I actually mean just that: God empower you to prosper. I ask about family and business not just to be polite.

Now, I’m not inviting them into my bedroom for any tΓͺte-Γ‘-tΓͺte or anything remotely closeΒ  but I’m definitely free. Worship will do that for you. It will help you heal because in worship only God is exalted. Every other thing takes back stage.
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In the place of worship, you are vulnerable and exposed no matter the mask or band-aid you carry. God sees right through you to the pain and he heals you.

How do I know? Because I’ve been there and I’ve been healed.

How do I know I’m really healed? That’s easy. Remember the nail story I just told you? Well I had to look down at my feet to remember which one it entered ‘cos it doesn’t hurt anymore only the scar remains. So, it’s exactly the same with emotional pain when only the scar remains and it’s just a memory of what once was then you are healed.

In my own case, only the scar of where they once were remains…no pain left… no pain at all…only the scar remains.

That in itself is a miracle.

Do you have any hurt you need to let go of? Or anyone you need to forgive? If it feels really hard to do then find a quiet corner and worship God.
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Worship makes it all better because it’s no longer about you but about God and if you let Him take over in worship, the things that were impossible for you as a man become possible and sometimes easier.

Will be back soon I hope. Mummy duty is becoming more time consuming but we can do this so next post out soon…..in Jesus name πŸ™‚

Until then there are a couple of worship meetings that will help you.
First there’s Mario Ese’s the Worship of Yahweh.
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Honestly, I’m in tears right now knowing I will miss this meeting. It will be a taste of heaven trust me. With worship leaders like Nathaniel bassey, Cobham Asuquo, Freke, Enitan Adaba, MK, Babz carpenterz, and the miracle worker crooner Gloreeyah…many others too. Trust me you can’t go wrong. Only hope it streams live. But if you can make it there, your life can never remain he same.

It’s holding Sunday 27th September 2015 at the Done of This Present House (my former church) end of admiralty way lekki phase one. Time: 5pm.

Then of course you know we know how to worship at DCC so two meetings coming up.
If you are on the island then don’t miss this on the 30th of September
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If you are on the mainland then don’t miss this on the 11th of October.
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Hopefully i’ll be back to give more details.
Love you.

24 thoughts on “#USseries 12: WHEN ONLY THE SCAR REMAINS…

  1. Haha
    Was just thinking of a ‘friend’ I had to let go…
    Quickly did a heart check… Errr is there some rot under the scab???

    Ok I’m coming lemme goan examine myself wella.

    Btw how come I’ve never heard this story of the nail. And I thot I had heard all the stories from the past. Haha

    I’m soooo attending TPH…
    Amen!!! Amen!!! Hopefully I can ‘borrow’ KingDaveed to someborry.

    Muah mama
    E’

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  2. Trust PM to always put up the right post at the very RIGHT TIME. Thanks ma 4 dis great and timely post. May God’s anointing continue 2 increase in your life. Hugs to David

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  3. Thank you for this, Mama. This is sooo me, this year! I’m not fully out of it yet, not totally over the pain but I’ve started to heal genuinely; and someday soon, I can absolutely say “only the scar remains…”.

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  4. Searching deeply…… yep just a little bit of pain. Sometimes I try to forget but that doesn’t help especially when u still have to see them, then u remember all over again.. It’s not all easy but God always has a way… beautiful read… But even more beautiful is the lesson behind the story… kisses to my people… oh and happy birthday in advance. I would send u a cake but mayowa doesn’t deliver to obodo oyinbo πŸ™‚

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  5. Haha. Ok I’m back
    #heartcheck… tick

    I’m doing aii… πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚
    Will I do better as time goes by? YES!!!

    Because like u implied, these things take time but as we YIELD totally, the HS will CONTINUE to work in us until we can’t even feel ‘somehow’ even if we tried…

    I recall my hubby saying something to me once in the middle of a convo that SHUT ME DOWN haha

    ‘…Eziaha, there is NOBODY in this world I bear a grudge toward…’

    Chai!!! I guess some personalities do have ’em.

    Dude just let’s it go as quickly as possible. And I know. Cos I’ve had to REMIND him of somethings before and he’s just like LOST!!!

    I think some personalities are easier sha (not to discount the work of the Holy Spirit of course…)

    I LOVE this post. We LOVE the lovey dovey mushy pies you been bakin’ recently up in here but we also love a mix of blogs like this from time to time…

    D V D kisses…

    E’

    Like

    1. I think yes some personalities handle it better but I also think it’s harder for women. We just never forget things except of course with the help of the Holy Spirit.

      Trust me darling the mushy ones come when I’m away from Pk just check the trend. Most of the mushy posts are when I’m away from home having Vida or David.

      So once I get back home we start talking serious issues. Lol!

      All kisses delivered

      Liked by 1 person

  6. And have a Happy birthday. Many more joyous years to celebrate in the Land of the living. Please accept this virtual stack of $πŸ’°πŸ’΅

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  7. I’ve never heard of this church nor do I know anyone here. But I got introduced to this blog and I have to say, it is 100 shades of amazing. I love how it reflects a deep understanding of God’s word. This is christianity, not religion…
    Thank you pastor Mildred.

    Like

  8. I stumbled on your blog as I’ve been looking for blogs that speak to me and, assides the fact that you are a pastor ( and by implication, a mentor of young ladies), what has totally gotten me hooked as I write is what I think to be your openness/humility/relatability- not sure which it is but it feels like a combination of all three and more all tied up by God’s grace!
    I think I’m here to stay!

    Like

  9. I stumbled on your blog as I’ve been looking for blogs that speak to me and, assides the fact that you are a pastor ( and by implication, a mentor of young ladies), what has totally gotten me hooked as I write is what I think to be your openness/humility/relatability- not sure which it is but it feels like a combination of all three and more all tied up in God’s grace!
    I think I’m here to stay!

    Like

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